Nope. Nadda. No Way Jose.

August 10, 2010 § Leave a comment

This McSweeneys post on rejection got me thinking about my new Biggest Loser Index. It’s mid-way through the month and I have only been rejected once. Or if I have been rejected more than that, it hasn’t hurt enough to leave a mark and that, my friends, is not rejected enough.

Yes, I’ve got my insecurities and a few long shots in the hopper (don’t we all?) but I’ve only got nine more business days to get rejected four more times, which means practically once every other day. What if my potential rejecters don’t pan out to nothing in time?

It’s time to think of five requests I’ve been too scared to ask for and ask for them right now. I’ll write them here so you can hold me accountable.

  • I’ll ask my student loan people to defer those buggers interest free for a few months until I start making the bucco bucks.
  • I’ll ask the roof guys to knock off a few bucks for their shoddy follow-through on finishing the project like they said they would.
  • I’ll ask each of the florists in our florist network to prominently display our Commemorate the Date fliers near their cash registers. 
  • I’ll ask one person (who by definition must remain nameless) if he wants me to ghost write a book for him.
  • Umm…
  • OK, I can only think of four. What else can I ask for? Please post any and all ideas as comments.
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